loser

I tried several titles for today’s post. I think this one is the best. But I don’t know who is the main character of my writing this time. Probably three of us in the family are all losers.

I’m not going to talk about others in my family. I don’t have the right to do that. I’m just talking about myself, my story, and my life.

I just turned 21. For 80% of my life, especially the recent 4 years, all I remember are two faces. One of them is made of stone. For some unknown reason, it has cracked all over since I saw it. Because of the crack, the face always looks scary to me and I’m afraid to approach it. The other face is made of sand, soft and beautiful. But the sand is too soft. The face has lost its shape. I tried to touch it, but the sand all slipped through my fingers like a piece of silk.

Therefore I turned myself into water, because water can smooth the crack surface of stone, and make the sand firmer. But I couldn’t make it. The water dried on the stone and soaked into deeper layer of the sand. Then, water realized because she’s lack of one thing, she couldn’t bound the three of them together. She’s doesn’t have cement - the trust and understanding inside a family. The mixture of sand, stone, water and cement is concrete, the strongest material for building anything. It won’t break no matter how you press or stretch it.

Water is so frustrated. She tried to find cement everywhere, but she failed. The stone face cracked more and sand face keeps losing its shape. Water started to cry but no one notices it, because she’s water. The stone face blames water that water doesn’t help her to smooth her surface. The sand face blames water that water makes him more out of shape.

Now, water just wants to find a sunny place and dry herself up. Maybe the summer breeze would take her steam somewhere else, somewhere she would never see stone and sand again...